[alone]
I don't really know why im sitting here tonight. Yes, partially it is an attempt to escape from doing any work at all tonight, but other than that I really don't know.
I guess I'm feeling like the title says, alone. But not the big bad scary Alone alone, just, lonely I guess.
I have no reason to feel this way. Absolutely none. I guess its just because for one reason or another, today sucked and I don't really know why. Jeez, I don't know alot do I?
It's so selfish. 65 huh, thats all I get when I lean my head on the keyboard in despair. 65 and a beep. And no-one is online.
I just don't feel real sometimes. And then sometimes I think everything that is at all wrong with me is in my head. Like, hell, if I really put my mind to it, I could eat normal food. Yeah, whatever. I just.. I dunno, I feel like a fraud and a total ass for taking up everyones time when there are worse hings happening and whatever it is that I'm messing myself up with is nothing really.
I'm talking crap again. I'm going to leave.
5 comments:
Nothing anyone is going through is nothing really. Everything is as equally important as the next persons, and its just our inner guilt system do-thingy's that tell us otherwise.
You're groovy. I like you. And so does he. And her. Ooh, and that guy over there. The one with the cape. So now you know that you've got all these people to come to if you're feeling down - even the guinea pig... what? She wasn't on the list... well she is now.
Trust me, you really aren't selfish, you've been through far more than so many of us in such a short space of time, more than any of us would want to go through, so trust me, you've really got a right to moan. If you ever need anyone to talk to, you know I'm here, and I'm sure as hell everyone else will be more than willing to lend a shoulder to lean on, I mean jeez, you'd sure as hell be there for them.
And 65 is a good number. A beep - even better. Far better than dfghsdf, much too cliche.
awwww, suzooles...
don't worry, we all feel shit sometimes, and as gordon said you've been through a hell of a lot. just remember, there will always be people there for you. trust me, they're probably more than you think as well.
hope you feel more cheery, stay beautiful.
Thanks guys. I appreciate that.
You two really do know how to be pricks, don't you...
Bastards.
thanks guys.. and david, i appreciate your apology.. i don't know what i was thinking when i wrote this, but if thats what it takes to make friends.. nah, seriously, it was what i felt at the time. so, whatever.
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